I will forever be grateful for the opportunity I had to stay at home and raise my triplets for the first five years of their life. I didn’t miss a thing. I saw their first smiles, their first steps and heard their first “I love you.” It has been a miracle to watch them change from such tiny preemie babies into healthy and happy toddlers.

With that said I now have to deal with a typical consequence of being an at-home-Mom for five years; trying to reenter the workforce. The “gap” on my resume is an eyesore. It is usually the first question I am asked on an interview and I am almost positive it is why I am having a more difficult time in finding a job than I did years ago.

Interviewer: “So, tell me about this gap on your resume starting in 2005.”

Me: “I decided to stay home and raise my family.”

Interviewer: [An awkward pause] “Okay.”

Okay seems like an innocent word but it can hold a lot of meaning when it is said in a certain way. Most interviewers say “okay” but I get the feeling they are thinking: (1) Wow – she hasn’t worked in five years. (2) She probably doesn’t know any of the new technology that has been developed over the years. (3) She may not remember how to handle a day in the office. (4) She will have to take off a lot of work days to run kids around to doctors and special events. (5) She has done nothing but relax in front of the television for five years, eating cookies and reading children’s books.

The assumptions made for an at-home-Mom could not be further from the truth. Most of us have developed skills that may take another person a few decades to master. I did a little research and found the top ten skills/qualities an employer is looking for in a future employee. At-home-Moms have perfected all of these:

1. Communication skills: We teach babies and toddlers how to speak. We are teachers of communication. We are so great at communication we even know what silence means.
2. Flexibility: We will not survive without perfecting our flexibility skills. We are cooking dinner, wiping markers off the walls, starting a load of laundry and then running downstairs to break up a fight over a toy pony. We are doing all I mentioned above within five minutes.
3. Negotiation skills: You want to see a Mom with her game-face on? There is no denying the strength behind that face. Negotiation is our specialty. Most men would crumble to a toddler who cries and screams to get what they want. Moms just ignore, clean something and then wait for the child to give in first. Basically, you can’t break us down.
4. Strong work ethic: We go beyond the call of duty by being on call 24/7 (including all holidays). We never rest and are always looking for ways to improve our efficiency and create a positive environment. We are 100% committed to our work.
5. Analytical skills: We constantly analyze procedures, events and daily activities to ensure they are done in the most cost-effective way with the best possible outcome. We identify problems long before they arise and are always prepared to tackle them head on.
6. Organization skills: We organize or we lose control of our household. In my household diapers were organized, bottles were prepared the night before, I created a spreadsheet to track bodily functions to ensure their systems were running correctly. When you have perfected how to track bowel movements of preemie triplets, you have reached the pinnacle of great organization skills.
7. Honesty and integrity: Children are very curious and ask a lot of questions. As a Mom it is my responsibility to be 100% honest with them. I want them to learn everything they need to learn in order to be a responsible, productive and knowledgeable adult. I always choose the honest route even when they ask me personal questions. However, I do lie about Santa Claus.
8. Motivation and initiative: Nothing shows motivation or initiative more than a Mom who loves her child. She will stay up all night to care for a sick child, she will encourage a child with wobbly legs to walk and when a doctor says, “There is nothing we can do to cure your child of Autism,” a Mom will search high and low to find a cure regardless.
9. Teamwork skills: If you are a Mom who participates in play-groups then teamwork skills are fully developed by the time your kids are toddlers. You will easily jump in and help other Moms. When you see any child falling, you immediately run to their rescue. You kiss boo-boos of kids you don’t even know, you help a Mom with full hands carry her baby and you always offer emotional support to new Moms who feel overwhelmed.
10. Computer skills: Computers are most likely a stay-at-home Mom’s best friend; they keep us connected. We are on Facebook, we blog, we tweet and we join forums. When our kids are sick, we conduct internet research to learn about symptoms and treatments. When our kids are inquisitive and ask, “What does a Zebra say?” we go online and find a voice recording to share with them. We have mastered the skills of putting together a home video to post on YouTube for family on the other side of the world to view. We have perfected Photoshop skills to make ourselves look better in family photos. We create Excel spreadsheets to track our budgets and we put together PowerPoint slide shows to show off our beautiful kids. And, we usually do all of the above with kids climbing on us and interrupting us every two minutes.
    
    

Even with a “gap” on my resume and the negative connotations that come along with it, I would never change one ounce of the decision I made. That was a special time in my life where I learned how to care for my kids, how to teach them, how to feed them, how to encourage them and even how to cure them. For me, the “gap” was the most fulfilling time of my life.

Feel free to print out my above list and take to your next interview. When the interviewer tells you, “So, it looks like you haven’t worked in five years” you can give them the list above and say, “I have worked hard, learned a lot and have grown as a person.”

Happy job hunting,

Alicia